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Showing posts with the label grief. my grief journey

One Month Gone

One month ago today we found out Kanton's  heartbeat was gone.  I am not sure how it has been a month already as if feels like we just found out yesterday.  It has been a tough month.  That is probably a huge understatement.  The grief is still so very raw. I still cry everyday for my boy - several times a day.   Everything reminds me of him. The birds. The butterflies. The rain.  I find myself staring at the clouds wondering what Heaven is like and what he is doing there without me.  I have read a lot of scripture.  I have read several devotionals. Some help more than others.  Being is public is still very hard for me.  I feel like the emotions are just under the surface and I never know when something is going to cause them to overflow. I find it to be a little easier when I am in a place where no one knows my story.   But then in a second something - or nothing - can happen that brings all my emo...